We must have rules.
We must have rules to govern ourselves against our demons.
Against those parts of ourself that cannot be eradicated, but rather must be overpowered time and time again, so that our better angels may prevail.
I feel as though I have lived without rules for some time now. Allowing the most destructive tendencies of myself to take over; self-imprisoned to my vices. The better parts of me dormant and without sunlight, seem to drift further and further away from reach. The better parts of me I once knew that seem to have been blocked out. Those parts of me I love most. Buried for so long. Those parts of me that make me better. Stronger. Wiser. Dependable. I long for resurrection. To bring those parts of me into the sunlight once more.
All around me I see the art and success of others, but yet I have been away from knowing how to create such things on my own, I have convinced myself I never can again.
It is my strong footing in optimism that pushes me forward. That says “Close your eyes. Rest. Tomorrow you can find it.” Listening to that voice or not is the rule I must follow. I must be strict in saying Yes to progress and No to a chaos that is so easily attainable.
Perhaps you have felt this way.
Perhaps you do feel this way.
Perhaps we have both forgotten the growth that comes from setting rules for our own lives —
Rules that say “consume good things and you yourself will grow into good.”
Rules that say today I will not cross this line — I will not step over into the ease of my vices to squelch my pain.
A rule that says that your life is worth living well.
Wellness of mind. Wellness of body. Wellness of spirit.
We must have rules, or we ourselves will be ruled.